100 Days of Horror welcomes you to ... SATANFEST 2013

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"Y'all know me, know how I earn a livin'. I'll catch this bird for you, but it ain't gonna be easy. Bad fish! Not like going down to the pond and chasing bluegills and tommycods. This shark, swallow ya whole. Little shakin', little tenderizin', and down you go. And we gotta do it quick, that'll bring back the tourists, that'll put all your businesses on a payin' basis. But it's not gonna be pleasant! I value my neck a lot more than three thousand bucks, chief. I'll find him for three, but I'll catch him, and kill him, for ten. But you've gotta make up your minds. If you want to stay alive, then ante up. If you want to play it cheap, be on welfare the whole winter. I don't want no volunteers, I don't want no mates, there's too many captains on this island. Ten thousand dollars for me by myself. For that you get the head, the tail, the whole damn thing."

Sunday, August 29, 2010

100 Days of Horror Day Thirty-Seven - "The Devil's Rejects!"


Late late late today, rabbit, but with good excuse! I have been sitting here all morning catching up on movies I have yet to see, courtesy of a 1 terabyte hard drive given to me as a present by one of my best friends, Brian "Barney" Barr. He hooked this brother up by stocking the damn thing with over 600 movies, old and new. So since 6 this morning I have watched "Borat," "Public Enemies" and "Kick-Ass." All procured by purely legal means, of this I am certain.

That and I had a pot of Maxwell House this morning and that shit has me jacked up, there's so damn much caffeine in that crap!

So before I delve into today's selection, let me just say this: I have now come to the conclusion that Johnny Depp is the finest actor of his generation. He is amazing.

And with that, I bring you to Day Thirty-Seven's selection, the new modern cult classic - Rob Zombie's "The Devil's Rejects." One of the best in 20 years or more. I tell you all about it below, yes. The Skinny, it's called. Check it.

The Devil's Rejects (2006): Directed by Rob Zombie. Starring Sid Haig, Sherri Moon Zombie, John Forsythe, Bill Mosley, Leslie Easterbrook and Ken Foree.

The Skinny: This follow-up to 2003's "House of 1,000 Corpses" has the Firefly Clan - Otis, Baby and that lovable clown Cap't. Spaulding - on the run after the cops invade their home and take Mother Firefly captive. As they decide on their next move, they leave chaos and violence in their path, all the while dogged by the brother of the sheriff they executed in the first film.

What's Good: In all honesty, the bizarre violence aside, this is not really a horror movie. "Corpses" was Zombie's take on slashers like "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" and Band of Freaks movies like "Last House on the Left." But "Rejects" plays more like Terrence Mallick's "Badlands" or Nick Cassavettes' "Straw Dogs" than it does a camp ride like "Corpses." But that's okay, because Zombie packs the script with quotable one liners and long speeches that delve deeply into the subconscious of the three killers. We also see tantalizing clips of the chemistry between the members of this bizarre family as they get to interact during car rides ("tutti fucking fruity!"). And while many of the other ancillary are only there to die as violent foils at the hands of our psychos, it's still a fun and - most times - disturbing ride. Peppered with character actors both big and small, "Rejects" is never boring and only partially laborious.

What's Bad: It gets a little tedious at time, watching these crazies torture over and over again with utter impunity - even if they do get their comeuppance (of sorts) in the end. For that very reason, a move like this has a very slim chance of appealing to a mass audience. Yet it made quite a bit of money, so it must have appealed to someone.

Why We Like It: What can I say, I'm sick. I love Capt. Spaulding, I love Otis, I love Baby ... damn it I love the whole sick movie from start to end. Who ever said I was wrapped tight?

Memorable Stuff: There's a lot of cool and very dark stuff in this film, but the bottom line most memorable thing is the end. I won't give it away for those who haven't seen it, but it has all the potential to bring a tear to even the most jaded of eyes.